Saturday, September 27, 2003

a couple of jokes...

A college professor was doing a study testing the senses of first
graders

using a bowl of lifesavers. He gave all the children the same kind of

lifesavers, one at a time, and asked them to identify them by color and

flavor. The children began to say:


Red............cherry

Yellow........lemon

Green........lime

Orange......orange


Finally the professor gave them all honey lifesavers. After eating them

for a few minutes none of the children could identify the taste.


"Well"' he said, "I'll give you a clue. It's what your mother might

sometimes call your father."


One little girl looked up in horror, spit hers out and yelled,

"Oh, my God! They're assholes!"
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A man is lying in bed in a hospital bed with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young nurse appears to sponge his face and hands. "Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "Are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed the young nurse replies, "I don't know Mr. Green, I'm only here to wash your face and hands."

He struggles again to ask, "Nurse, Are my testicles black?"

Again the nurse replies, "I can't tell. I'm only here to wash your face and hands."

The ward supervisor was passing and saw the man getting a little distraught so she marched over to inquire what was wrong.

"Nurse," he mumbled, "Are my testicles black?"

Being a nurse of longstanding, she was undaunted. She whipped back the bedclothes, pulled down his pajama pants, moved his penis out of the way, had a right good look, pulled up the pajamas, replaced the bedclothes and announced, "Nothing wrong with them!!!"

At this the man pulled off his oxygen mask and asked again, "Are my test results back???
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